Under "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," a distinction was drawn between homosexual behavior (or conduct) and homosexual status. The latter, absent homosexual conduct, was not grounds for discharge. Soldiers were not supposed to be asked about their sexual orientation, and homosexuals were supposed to be able to serve in the military provided they kept their sexual orientation to themselves. Activities such as participation in gay rights parades and reading homosexual publications were permissible.

Homosexual conduct, however, constituted a dischargeable offense. It included not only same-gender sexual behavior – the definition commonly used by social and behavioral scientists – but also attempts to marry a person of the same gender and statements by a service member that demonstrated a propensity or intent to engage in homosexual acts. This included statements that one is homosexual. Such statements created a rebuttable presumption that one has engaged in or will engage in homosexual behavior (DOD Directive 1332.14, 1993).

Understanding the implications of the status-conduct distinction is important for understanding the policy, as well as the issues likely to be raised in implementing a nondiscriminatory policy. As explained below, the distinction between sexual conduct and the status of sexual orientation tends to be interpreted differently for heterosexuals and homosexuals.
 

First, it is useful to consider broadly the concept of sexual orientation. Although heterosexual and homosexual behaviors alike have been common throughout human history, the ways in which cultures have made sense of these behaviors and the rules governing them have varied widely. For at least a century in the United States and Europe, human sexuality has been popularly understood in terms of a dichotomy between two types of people: those who are attracted to their same gender (homosexuals) and those who are attracted to the other gender (heterosexuals). Individuals whose behavior crosses these categories have usually been labeled bisexual or have had their behavior explained as the product of situational factors, such as a sex-segregated environment, or developmental factors, such as an age-specific stage of sexual experimentation.

The categories of homosexual, heterosexual, and bisexual are collectively described by the umbrella term, sexual orientation. In Western industrialized societies, sexual orientation is often defined as an enduring pattern of or disposition to experience sexual, affectional, or romantic desires for and attractions to men, women, or both sexes. Most discussions treat sexual orientation as a dichotomy between heterosexual and homosexual.

Reliance on the dichotomized construct of sexual orientation represents a particular way of understanding sexuality. It focuses on the individual rather than the behavior. Instead of conceiving of people as capable of a wide range of sexual attractions and behaviors, the heterosexual-homosexual dichotomy creates two ideal types which, depending on the individual, correspond more or less to actual experience and behavior (for historical perspectives on the heterosexual-homosexual dichotomy, see Duberman, Vicinus, & Chauncey, 1989; Katz, 1983; for cross-cultural perspectives, see Herdt, 1984).
 

Although the construct of sexual orientation is often discussed exclusively in terms of sexual feelings and conduct, it encompasses other aspects of human experience as well. Sexual attraction and expression are important components of romantic relationships. Consequently, sexual orientation is integrally linked to the close bonds that humans form with others to meet their personal needs for love, attachment, and intimacy. These bonds are not simply about specific sexual acts, or sexual acts with members of a particular gender. They also encompass nonsexual physical affection, shared goals and values, mutual support, and ongoing commitment.

In addition, one’s sexual orientation is closely related to important personal identities, social roles, and community memberships. For heterosexuals, these identities and roles include husband and wife, and father and mother. Most heterosexuals experience their sexuality, their romantic and affectional relationships, and their social roles and community memberships based upon those relationships as a central component of who they are, that is, their sense of self or identity.
 

Like heterosexuality, a homosexual orientation is closely related to important personal identities, social roles, and community memberships. These identities and community connections are emphasized by the use of self-referent terms such as gay and lesbian. Homosexuality, however, is stigmatized in the United States. Whereas normal sexuality is equated with heterosexuality in U.S. culture, homosexuals historically have been regarded as abnormal and deviant, and have accordingly been stigmatized as sinners, criminals, and psychopaths. Stigma persists to the present day.

Consequently, for homosexual persons to disclose or affirm their sexual orientation is to identify themselves as members of a stigmatized group. Moreover, because people are assumed to be heterosexual unless evidence is provided to the contrary, disclosing that one is homosexual requires an interruption of the normal flow of social interaction. Because the social roles available to homosexual persons are not desexualized as are heterosexual roles, an assertion that one has a same-gender partner or that one is gay is often interpreted primarily as a statement about one’s private sexual conduct.

For many people, however, to be gay or lesbian is to assume a quasi-ethnic identity that represents membership in a larger community and is central to their sense of self. By stating "I am gay" or "I am lesbian" or "I am a homosexual," an individual affirms that identity and community membership. Such affirmations are a critical component of the process of identity formation and integration of the identity with other aspects of the self, an important component of psychological health.

Consequently, lesbians and gay men must choose between actively projecting a heterosexual facade (colloquially termed being in the closet), passively allowing others to assume that they are heterosexual, or explicitly disclosing their sexual orientation to others (colloquially termed coming out of the closet, or simply coming out). Because most gay men and lesbians regularly encounter new people who presume that they are heterosexual, coming out is an ongoing process. They must make daily choices about their level of disclosure to others.

Some gay men and lesbians structure their lives in such a way that their sexual orientation is common knowledge. They are often referred to as being openly gay or lesbian, because they do not rigorously restrict others’ access to information about their sexual orientation. Although being openly gay might sometimes be accomplished through going public – that is, publicly disclosing their sexual orientation by coming out on a television program or in a newspaper interview – it more often involves private conversations with friends and family members. In addition, gay people sometimes allow their sexual orientation to become common knowledge by disclosing to several people and allowing normal processes of social interaction to disseminate the information. Another strategy is to convey information to others indirectly, for example, by mentioning that one attended a gay-oriented social function or by being seen with other people who are known to be gay.

A recent national survey revealed that approximately 45% of U.S. heterosexual adults who know at least one gay person first learned about the individual’s sexual orientation directly from that person herself or himself (Herek & Capitanio, 1996). Another 16% initially guessed or learned about it through a third party, but subsequently discussed it directly with the gay or lesbian friend or relative. Such disclosure almost always occurred in cases where survey respondents described the gay or lesbian individual as a close friend or immediate family member, rarely occurred when he or she was a distant relative, and occurred slightly more than half the time when he or she was an acquaintance or a casual friend. Thus, approximately 61% of American adult heterosexuals who know gay men or lesbians were told directly by at least one gay friend or relative about his or her homosexuality, with such revelations occurring more often in close relationships than in distant relationships. Conversely, the data also indicate that gay men and lesbians do not completely control information about their sexual orientation. In 32% of the relationships with a gay person reported by heterosexuals in the national sample, the respondent initially learned that the friend, relative, or acquaintance was homosexual through a third party. In another 30% of the relationships, the respondent initially guessed that the friend, relative, or acquaintance was gay.
 

This discussion highlights some of the complexities of sexual orientation, and points out some important discontinuities between the experiences of heterosexuals and homosexuals. Under "Don't Ask, Don't Tell," military personnel are allowed to be open about their sexual orientation if they are heterosexual: They can wear a wedding band, tell others about their spouse, and be seen publicly with her or him. These behaviors are not regarded by others as sexual or as an inappropriate sexual display. Comparable conduct by a gay person, however, may be perceived by others as sexual. Thus, even if gay people were held to the same standards of conduct as heterosexuals, their behaviors might be interpreted differently. A member of the Army, for example, may be openly gay in that he has told his coworkers and supervisor that he is a homosexual. Even if he does not mention any aspect of his private sexual conduct, however, others may perceive his disclosure as an inappropriate flaunting of his sexuality, and may respond negatively.
 

In summary, individuals’ sexual orientation encompasses not only their sexual conduct but also their closest personal relationships, their social roles and identity, and their memberships in larger communities. Because heterosexual identities and roles are desexualized whereas their homosexual counterparts are not, the same behavior can be regarded very differently depending on whether it is performed by a heterosexual or homosexual. If the Army adopts a new policy in which the same standards of behavior are applied to gay and heterosexual personnel, it will be important to identify the best strategies for teaching personnel to understand which types of behavior and speech are considered sexual — and therefore should be kept private — and which types of behavior and speech are permissible in public settings.
 

Duberman, M.B., Vicinus, M., & Chauncey, G., Jr. (1989). Hidden from history: Reclaiming the gay and lesbian past. New York: New American Library.

Herdt, G.H. (Ed.) (1984). Ritualized homosexuality in Melanesia. Berkeley: University of California Press.

Herek, G. M. (1992). The social context of hate crimes: Notes on cultural heterosexism. In G. M. Herek & K.T. Berrill (Eds.), Hate crimes: Confronting violence against lesbians and gay men (pp. 89-104). Newbury Park, CA: Sage.

Herek, G.M. (1996). Why tell if you’re not asked? Information disclosure, intergroup contact, and heterosexuals’ attitudes toward lesbians and gay men. In G. Herek, J. Jobe, & R. Carney (Eds.), Out in force: Sexual orientation and the military (pp. 197-225). Chicago: University of Chicago Press.

Herek, G. M., & Capitanio, J. P. (1996). "Some of my best friends": Intergroup contact, concealable stigma, and heterosexuals' attitudes toward gay men and lesbians. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 22, 412-424.

Katz, J.N. (1983). Gay/lesbian almanac: A new documentary. New York: Harper & Row.

Sarbin, T. (1996). The deconstruction of stereotypes: Homosexuals and military policy In G. Herek, J. Jobe, & R. Carney (Eds.), Out in force: Sexual orientation and the military (177-196). Chicago: University of Chicago Press.
 

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